Comparison is the thief of joy.
- Theodore Roosevelt
We have all done this before. Leo Baubata of Zen Habits said, “One of the biggest reasons we’re not content with ourselves and our lives is that we compare ourselves to others.”
It’s true.
In the strength and fitness world, I see this all the time. You see photos of people with a fit and healthy body which might make you feel bad about yours. I’ve been asked by female clients if I could get their butts to look like Jessica Biel’s, and guys wanted a chest like Arnold Schwarzenegger. Sorry ladies, you’re butt will never look like Jessica Biel’s and guys you will not get a chest like Arnold. But ladies, you definitely can still build a nice rear (guys, too) and guys can still get a chiseled chest. Need help? Don’t be afraid to ask.
Or maybe you are on Facebook and see people posting pictures of their latest travel adventure, eating at fancy restaurants, driving nice cars, talking about their cool careers, and you think to yourself – “What am I not doing these things?”
I’ll use myself as an example: When I first started lifting weights, my body wasn’t progressing as fast at some of the guys around me. I worked out just as hard as them, could lift heavier, had a basic understanding of programming at that time, and I know for a fact my nutrition was much better than theirs although it wasn’t the best. But yet, I still wasn’t seeing the muscle gains I wanted and here are these other ‘bros’ who were looked jacked!
It was definitely frustrating.
When you compare yourself with others, you lose sight of all the things you achieved and the progression you made. Comparing yourself to another person only sets you up for failure, frustration, and a crappy feeling.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s not a bad thing to want to achieve a particular goal that someone has already achieved. But it won’t help your journey if you constantly compare where you are today with someone who’s already has achieved the goal you are out for. It makes no sense.
It’s like comparing the sweetness of a mango with the saltiness of the ocean – does that make sense?
Exactly.
So I stopped comparing myself with the dude in the gym with huge muscles and focused on myself. I stopped seeing how much weight someone else is lifting, and worried about beating my own numbers.
It’s all about comparing yourself to yourself day to day, and making sure you are getting better each day. You learn a lot more about yourself and enjoy the ride much more.
Enjoy the ride my friends.
Aloha!
Incredibly powerful post indeed!
This statement right here was definitely profound:
“When you compare yourself with others, you lose sight of all the things you achieved and the progression you made. Comparing yourself to another person only sets you up for failure, frustration, and a crappy feeling.”
If we are really doing something with our lives, being proud of our own accomplishments is the first step to keep making progress. Every person has their own set of circumstances for successes and failures but in the end accepting where we are in life and wanting to improve for our own good is the best way to achieve eventual success.
Well said Marcus. it’s all about keeping focus on what you have to do to achieve your goals. Mahalo!